Support is key, don't stop believing

The writing process is different for everyone, and since embracing my dream to go from simply being a writer to becoming an author, I find that I've taken on a whole new mentality when it comes to my work.  In the fact that I actually take my writing a great deal more seriously than I once did.  Not that I didn't exactly take it seriously before...okay, maybe I didn't, but that's not the case anymore. 

Lately when I sit down to write it's with the idea and belief that I actually have something to say and a story worth telling, which was something I kind of knew before but honestly didn't believe.  But all of that began to change when I finally opened my up and admitted I needed a support group.  A group of writers who, like me, were going through the trenches and could relate to me and my passion to succeed.  It's made all the difference in the world, with even more support coming from some of the most surprising and unexpected places (mostly all of you).  I feel such zeal for my work now that I even find myself wanting to share with everyone, despite my fears and not-so-latent insecurities. 

Now some of you may not realize how completely revolutionary the last part of that statement really is for me, but you have to understand that my writing is like my baby.  My only baby.  Which I'm sure is a feeling and connection most writers can relate to when it comes to their writing.  So often times, my way of trying to protect "my baby" from the big bad world of critics and rejection is to keep it very close to me, sharing it with no one.  Talking about it to no one, except, on the rare occasion when I'd work up the nerve to share something I had written with my hubby or the quirky ball of randomness that is my mother.

So I began to question again, why the thought of sharing my work bothered me so much?  Especially after being in this community and encountering so many brave writers who gladly and openly shared their work and passion everyday (warts and all).  While I still scurried to the nearest cave, wishing to do nothing more than bury away my stories and ideas.  And then it hit me.  After all the blog hopping and even after reading amazing articles with Sheryl Sandberg and writing a blog about what would you do if you weren't afraid, I realized while I wasn't so much afraid of actually writing anymore, I still had held onto the fear of disappointing those I had newly come to care about and respect, and of being rejected by my readers. 

Yeah, talk about putting pressure on yourself. Especially when logically I know that not everyone will like or enjoy my work.  That sort of thought and expectation is simply asking to be battered and bruised from the word go, and I wouldn't survive this business if I really thought that way.

But with a ROCKSTAR support group who call you out regularly on your work and offer some much needed and often times greatly repeated encouragement, I have found I don't linger so much over the blahdity blah blah stuff anymore, and instead focus on moving forward, because even the tiniest step is better than no step at all.  So I cannot emphasize enough how important it is to find and nurture a good support group.  A group of people who will push you and believe in you, when you can't seem to find the will to believe in yourself at time. 

So all-in-all I guess this post is mostly a HUGE thank you to my fellow #DreamWeavers and many many others who have on a daily basis pushed me to strive and be the best version of myself and to keep writing, and plugging away.  Because while I may or may not have given up on my dreams in those darker moments without you, I definitely wouldn't have gotten as far as I have if it weren't for you.

Now to all you BRILLIANT readers/writers/artists WHOEVER you are...remember that support is key.  And if there is nothing else that you take from this post, I think we can all take a bit of advice from the awesomeness that is JOURNEY!!!

(LOL! You know me, I just couldn't resist.)

Journey - "Don't Stop Believing"

Happy Writing & Happy Reading!!!

What would you do if you weren't afraid?

In a recent article published in The New Yorker titled “A Woman’s Place” a question was posed that completely stopped me in my tracks and had me searching for answers. 

What would you do if you weren’t afraid?

Now for the rare few in life, this is a question that they embrace as a daily call to action.  But so often for the rest of us, when we wake each morning and make plans, set goals or take on the really important decisions such as should I attend college, what college should I attend, what career path should I take? It’s often with these sorts of premeditated questions that some of us also set limits for our lives.  Limits that tell us that there is only so far we can go and only so much success we can achieve in our lives.  And so we give ourselves permission to set “standard” expectations, which later soothes our conscience when we meet these expectations and then allows us to reasonably argue the case that “Hey, at least I’m doing something.” 

And I will readily admit that I have been guilty of hiding behind this frame of thought, often approaching a new idea with the pre-determined mindset that I would rather set my standards low, than push myself and risk having the burden of a failure on my conscience.

But if you were to completely remove the “fear factor” out of the equation, where would you be?  How far could you go if you approached each day ready to take on the world with a mindset absent of fear?  What would your future, what would your world look like with that frame of possibility?

In her commencement address to the 2011 graduating class of Barnard College, Facebook Chief Operating Officer, Sheryl Sandberg offered these words for thought.  

Sheryl Sandberg - Facebook COO

“We try at Facebook to keep all of our employees thinking big all day.  We have these posters in red we put around the walls.  One says, “Fortune favors the bold.”  Another says, “What would you do if you weren’t afraid?”  That question echoes Barnard alum Anna Quindlen, who said that she majored in unafraid.  Don’t let your fears overwhelm your desire.  Let the barriers you face—and there will be barriers—be external, not internal.  Fortune does favor the bold, and I promise that you will never know what you’re capable of unless you try.”

So…what would YOU do if you weren’t afraid?

Happy Writing & Happy Reading!